SLASH (2002)

Lead singer (O’Shea) of the rock band Slash (and I use the term ‘rock’ lightly, I mean, these guys are about as hardcore as S Club 7 for God’s sake. Never trust a rock band who actually smile while they sing. Even Bon Jovi wouldn’t do that) is urged to return home to his Hicksville USA hometown and the MacDonald Farm (heh, heh) because his Aunt has died. Naturally, the band goes with him including icy girlfriend Robinson, (whom you might recognise from The Lone Gunmen) and an assortment of other stereotypical teens. They provide the corpses after O’Shea’s estranged, slightly bent, backwoods daddy Old MacDonald (Railsback) starts bringing up old wounds and superstitious talk, and a mysterious killer turns up (looking an awful lot like the Creeper from Jeepers Creepers) to bump them off. Oh, and the band’s bus breaks down, so they won’t be going anywhere in a while .
Sadly, walking corpses is all the characters are in this rather bland mixture of Children of the Corn and the previously mentioned Jeepers Creepers (the film’s tagline is surely one of the worst I’ve ever encountered- ‘It’s Harvest Time!’). The characters are totally without interest and totally unlikeable, thus it becomes very hard to give a gigantic, rosy-red baboon’s butt whether they live or die. Heck, there’s even a wise-ass black guy in the band, who in a shockingly misguided stereotype, is the only one packing heat.

On the positive side we have Railsback’s childishly grinning, oddball dad whose unnerving comments are often followed by ‘…just yankin’ ‘yer chain…’, and we are never entirely sure if he is or not, the guy did play Charles Manson, after all. Nick Boraine plays fellow hick Billy Bob who clearly comes from the Gary Busey School of Acting-With-Your-Teeth, and he’s quite a bit of fun.
The film looks wonderful, the cinematography elevates the film to quite a watchable level, even though the story has been done to death. Even when the screenplay thinks it’s being clever it manages to screw things up. I mean, how many of this film’s brain-dead target audience are gonna get that Byrds reference at the funeral? The opening scene in particular has a nice sepia-toned look about it. The film has a lovely use of fog and great contrast between the light and the shadows that instantly appeals to the Gothic horror fan in me. It’s also just nice to see one of these post “Scream” slashers that seems to have been directed and lensed with some degree of skill and care.

I really ought to hate this film as there’s not much gore, even less sex and nudity, and very little originality, but some of these modern slasher flicks are actually OK, and this one’s nowhere near the worst. Wait until you hear the song played at the end, which (and I’m seriously not yankin’ ‘yer chain) features a chant of ‘E-I-E-I-O!’ in the chorus (MacDonald Farm, get it?) somewhat similar in style to Skid Row’s 'Youth Gone Wild' (Oh, come now, I'm not the only one old enough to remember Skid Row). Hilarious.